PSYCHOLOGICAL BEHAVIOUR WITH ME AND MY
PITUITARY TUMOUR / AMGYDULA GLAND PROBLEMS !!
HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !! - Me again - Now - before I forget - I have come here to write a piece of the above as I have just read a fantastic article that a chap had written - ( link inc -
https://lookingintothemuir.wordpress.com/2014/04/17/the-psychological-behavior-changes-of-pituitary-tumors/?blogsub=confirming#subscribe-blog ) and it was so inspirational to ME - I thought I may be able to help the cause and help someone else !! - lol - Just by letting them know that the symptoms THEY are experiencing are NOT PSYCHOTIC OR PSYCHOLOGICAL !! - YES - They are two different things !!
Psychosis is an umbrella term to describe the mental state of losing touch with reality. A number of things can cause psychosis, from schizophrenia to depression to sleep deprivation.
Psychopathy, is a personality disorder which consists of a lack of empathy, impulsivity, recklessness, scrupulousness, callousness, and lying.
NOW - ALL of the above can and have been Symptoms of MY Particular DIAGNOSED Pituitary Tumour - BUT = Due to the Pit Tumour Pressing on the Front Lobal Cortex - IT MAKES IT MEDICAL AND NOT A MENTAL PROBLEM - Although - I can and have and DO CONTINUE to show as ALL OF THE ABOVE - It is actually KNOWN to the Crisis Team that none of the USUAL ways to calm a Psychosis or Psychological Patient down ( Ie - sit is darkened room / listen to music / watch TV - If I in fact did the latter - it would cause me to become further distressed and get me worked up even further - I do however need to be in a darkened room - and have EVERY BRAIN STIMULANT taken away from me - NO NOISE / LIGHT / SMELL / ETC )
Ohhh theres a thing - I also get odd smells when NO-ONE else does - Usually Cigarettes or Toast - Apparently this is indication of immence Brain Pressure !! - Yeah Yeah - I Knew that !!! and can be bloody irritating esp if 12pm at night and Im wandering round thinking my 12 year old has taken up smoking or that the 9 year old has decided she wants a lil snack !!! I defo DONT think my 12 year old would ever smoke - but a lil snack could be on the cards - so - you can imagine I have to go check !!! = By this time I have woken everyone up - and everyone is out looking for cigarettes and burning toast !! = lol = NEVER TO BE FOUND !! - after about the fourth time I realised this was in fact my blinking head playing tricks !!
OK - My Psychiological symptoms !!
1) Think I can hear people shouting my name
2) See 'things' running past me at speed - but there is nothing there
3) Think things are coming AT me - Ie - When in a car - I think NO-ONE is going to stop - and I do actually scream !!
4) Head Banging on Wall
5) Crying - uncontrollable and Irrational ( also have Rational Crying !! )
5a) Crying But just tears - no reason -
5b) Crying because of Head Pressure
6) Suicidal Thoughts ( Have taken one overdose - even looked up on PC how many to take - but - apparently - this wasn't enough as I am as Big - Weight wise - as I am - and I had far too much Cortisol and Adrenaline in my body for the mix I took to take hold - and so I was Toxic !! - But Not Lethal dose ! - So this then wound me right up too !! )
7) Anyone looks at me 'funny' or Trys to be intimidating, Controlling, Calls me stupid, Makes me out to be Care in the Community, Is Rude, Doesn't say thank you etc etc - SO SO MANY DIFFERENT THINGS can start me off on a RAGE ! - TRIGGERS AS I CALL IT - and once this takes hold - within a split second - then NOTHING works to calm me down - NOTHING - except Diazepam - That Calms me - But never to the extent of making me sleep - I have before now taken 17 x 2mg Diazepam ( Over a five hour period ) and that has just brought me back to Normal levels again - Never sleepy !!
8) Sometimes I want to be Social - and will chat to people in the street - Just even telling them they look nice, Other days I cant even leave my bedroom, Cant even see my own kids ....
9) Anxious when anything NEW happens, actually - Anxious when anything AT ALL happens !!
10) Hate people and Angry at anyone and everyone - for no reason
11) The above but because I think something has been said or done against me or someone I know - or towards an eldery person or vunerable person or animal - Then I also become
12) Confrontational and Aggressive
13) Emotionally I think no-one wants me about - they would be better off if I wasn't there being a burden
14) Can NEVER remember things - even my childhood is a blur - and even if it has just been said to me - BUT - I can remember odd things - like song lyrics I have not heard for years and years - after prompting I can also remember the odd thing - but - usually I cant remember ....
15) Lack of Concentration - when I need to use my brain - ie talking on the phone to people I don't know - or reading - watching complex TV - I switch off
16 ) Switching off is my brain shuts of and I zoom in on a particular thing and can do that thing for hours - like this blog - it is just being done and im not stoping till it is done - when I think of what to put - my brain kinda has a POP - Kinda like a stitch popping - its very odd - also when concentrating on parts - the back of my head starts to Pulsate and hurt ... I cant even breathe while I am writing such long sentances as I am concentrating so much on getting down what I want too before I forget it !!!
17) HYSTERIA - Total and utter laughing - not being able to stop - usually triggered by daft things - for instance - other people with laugh but then carry on - I have tears running down my face, I go red, cant breathe, the TV Usually has to stop as I disrupt everyone - and then everyone gets angry with me - and then that makes me worse - !!! I have been known to stop - and then tv starts again - and then they have to stop the tv again as I have started laughing again and that's it - cant stop again !! - I have been known to wake myself up laughing !!
18) Mood Changes - One minute I can be inconsolable and the next in hysterics then the next trying to get the car keys off the ex so I can go and drive into a wall .... then laughing again - all within 10 minutes ...
19) I am always tired - Unless im so tired and go to bed - then - I WAKE UP !!!! and cant sleep till ohhhh five or six hours later !!
20) WHEWWW WHEWWWW - I CANT THINK OF A NUMBER 20 !!! - LOL - at the moment anyways !!!
(20) - yes I did - UNCONTROLLABLE TOURETTES = !! - If I cant speak - I can swear - always
These are just a few of the challenges I go through daily - and yeah - I can and have these symptoms - ALL OF THEM - on a daily basis - and YES - IT IS TO DO ENTIRELY WITH THE PITUITARY GLAND AND THE DODGY AMGYDULA GLAND THAT I HAVE - AND NOTHING TO DO WITH BEING MENTALLY PROBLEMATIC !!!!!
DOCTORS AND GP'S AND CONSULTANTS NEED TO DO MORE WORK IN THIS AREA .... I have even just been told that I would be offered a Psychiatric Bed OR a Knock Out Drug for a few days JUST SO MY EX HUSBAND ( Who is suffering ALMOST as much as me ) COULD HAVE RESBITE AWAY FROM ME - This of course made me flip and caused the EX to take the kids and go and live in a Caravan for four days - hence me having the time to do this !!! - AND THAT IS FROM A MEDICAL PRACTITIONER WHO ALSO TOLD ME TO TRY YOGA TO CALM DOWN - She is lucky I didn't headbutt her !!!
PITUITARY AWARENESS DAY SHOULD BE MADE PUBLIC AND EVERYONE - EVEN TAUGHT IN SCHOOLS - SHOULD BE MADE AWARE THAT THE ENTIRE BODY IS RUN BY THIS TINY GLAND ........ IT IS NOT TO BE TAKEN LIGHTLY !!
OK OK - Talking gibberish now - so best stop - worn myself out !! Mentally = Not Physically -
OHHH THERES
20) Get so tired Mentally that I stutter and walk as though I am drunk - to the degree I could go in front of a car
21) Makes up words - mid sentence - that mean nothing to anyone
ok ok - the end !! - I do think I could go on even more though !!! lol !! xx
